Wonder Woman Thoughts

Hello! So this isn't so much a movie review, it's more of a ramble about what I thought about the film but I hope you like it anyway.

It's been over 50 years but finally, we have a female superhero movie ... and it's good!! I'm so so glad they didn't mess it up. It's not perfect as a film I'll say that much but the importance of Wonder Woman essentially overrules any pedantic thoughts I had.

Gal Gadot is the perfect Wonder Woman; she's good at the humour, she's good at the drama, she's good at the fighting and while I don't want to reduce her to her physical attributes but my god she might be the most stunning woman I've ever seen. It was so good to have a female hero at the forefront of a movie without her playing second fiddle to a dude. As she grew up solely around women she had no reason to ever think her gender would be a hindrance to her. When you finally see her in the costume, my internal monologue was essentially just AAAAAAAH.

Chris Pine as Steve also deserves a little shoutout. I adore Chris Pine anyway but he was played Steve extremely well, never taking away the spotlight from Wonder Woman herself. I wish they'd gone a little bit more into some of the other male characters backgrounds like Charlie and the Chief as they were basically just kind of there and they did seem like interesting characters, but who knows they may make a return!

I will admit the film itself is maybe a little slow at times and some things are left unexplained (Marvel are not very good at treating their female characters well but their films are better executed than DC sorry not sorry) but I think the fact a big studio is finally taking steps towards using their brilliant female characters is a wonderful thing.... so if we could just have a Black Widow movie soon that would be great thank u marvel.

Sorry it's short - I've got exams and I've been procrastinating enough as it is!
Laura

Manchester

I needed to just write something about this as my heart is in pieces and none of my house are awake to lament with me.

By now you've probably heard that there was an explosion, suspected terror attack,  at Ariana Grande's concert last night in Manchester in which 22 people have died and many more injured. It's always horrendous whenever anything happens like this but Manchester is a place I adore and I have friends from there, friends who are at uni there now, people I admire in the Youtube and celebrity world; it's their hometown. I've been to Manchester Arena a few times myself. The city itself is lovely and a place I will happily visit again and again. So this is hitting pretty close to home in a strange way.

I think it's the fact that  I know some of the dead are going to be children. Kids who just like Ariana's music and were probably so excited about seeing her and they never got home. They should be at school today and they aren't. My heart absolutely breaks for their families.  I can't even imagine how horrible this is.

However, the British people are the most resilient people I've ever come across, I should know I'm a British person myself. The emergency services are absolutely brilliant, running towards the danger. Taxi drivers were offering free lifts, people offering their spare rooms for those stranded, local hotels ensuring kids separated from their parents are safe and trying to help them get in contact. I even saw a guy on twitter from Liverpool who drove between the cities all night giving lifts where he could and refusing to take money for it as well. People have been queuing at blood donation centres this morning. It is people like this that need to be remembered, not the murderer whoever they may be.

It takes tragedy to show how good humans can be as well, which I suppose is sad in a way but at least for everyone affected by this attack they know there is someone out there who is going to listen and going to help. If I was in the area I would be doing something to try and help but seeing as I'm about 100 miles away there isn't much I can do but offer words of support so I guess I'm here if you need a chat.

I feel better for getting this out in some form. So thanks for reading despite the mess of a post it is. If you want to know what I'm feeling but in a more articulate way James Corden did a lovely video on his show that sums it up.

The emergency number is this if you happen to be reading this and could do anything to help (I know it's a long shot but still) : 0161 856 9400

Laura x

30 Day Movie Challenge....in one post because I'm lazy

I mean I have nothing else to say than the title really. I saw my lovely friend Holly doing this on twitter and I thought I wanna do that but all in one go because knowing me I'd completely forget I was doing it. Sorry the last few posts have just been talking about my interests but hey I'm good at talking about my own interests. Also sorry if any of these repeat...

1. Your favourite movie
 I have far too many but the Harry Potter movies in general.
2.  The last movie you watched 
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2
3. Your favourite action/adventure movie 
Kingsman: The Secret Service
4.  Your favourite horror movie
The only horror movie I've ever willing watched and enjoyed was Suburban Gothic
5. Your favourite drama movie 
A tie between the Imitation Game and Hidden Figures
6. Your favourite comedy movie 
Hot Fuzz
7. A movie that makes you happy
Mary Poppins
8. A movie that makes you sad
Marley and Me
9. A movie you practically know the whole script of
Any Harry Potter movie
10. Your favourite director
Tim Burton
11. Your favourite movie from your childhood
Cinderella
12. Your favourite animated movie
SO MANY... but Big Hero 6 and Zootopia are excellent
13. A movie you used to love but now hate
Honestly not sure there are any ....
14.  Your favourite quote from any movie
Okay I think a lot of my favourite movie quotes are also from books too so I'm omitting them. So I think one that is purely from a movie is probably "My philosophy is worrying means you suffer twice" from Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Despite the fact I am the biggest worrier alive, it is a good philosophy to have. 
15. The first movie you saw in the cinema
Finding Nemo
16. The last movie you saw in the cinema
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2
17. The best movie you saw in the last year
Hidden Figures
18. A movie that disappointed you the most
The Fault in Our Stars
19. Your favourite actor
Eddie Redmayne
20. Your favourite actress
Emma Thompson
21. The most overrated movie
La La Land.... sorry about it. I liked it but it perhaps didn't need all of the hype it got.
22. The most underrated movie
What If
23. Your favourite character from any movie
Technically a literary character but Hermione Granger
24. Favourite documentary
No idea if I even have one
25. A movie no-one would expect you to love
Unstoppable
26. A movie that is a guilty pleasure
Shrek tbh
27. Favourite classic movie
The Sound of Music
28. Movie with the best soundtrack
Pirates of the Caribbean
29. A movie that changed your opinion about something
The Theory of Everything - it didn't necessarily change my opinion on anything but it definitely made me feel like I'd watched something that had an effect on me.
30. Your least favourite movie
I don't know because I've probably never watched it

My top five fave musicals!

I absolutely adore musical theatre, always have and probably always will and I honestly think there is something for everybody within musical theatre. It's a very accepting, wide-ranging place.

So today as I felt like writing about something and why not I'm going to give you a rundown of my five favourite musicals (I may do a follow up post about songs....and Disney musicals). I am aware a lot of my favourite musicals are the most popular ones....but there is a reason they are popular. 

5. Oliver!

- Oliver has a special place in my heart as it was the first musical I ever acted in myself .... at the age of 10 and a primary school production where I played the owner of the funeral parlour but still. I've a lot of pleasant memories attached to this show and I was lucky enough to see Rowan Atkinson (Mr Bean and all-round comedy legend) play Fagin in the West End. I remember it being amazing, the entire show has such heart and the music is wonderful. It's funny, it tugs at the heartstrings and it's overall a truly wonderful show.  

Favourite song - Consider Yourself

4. Rocky Horror Picture Show

- Whether you've seen the film or seen it live you will know how truly insane Rocky Horror is. Trying to explain the plot to people who have no idea about it is makes you realise how weird it truly is. But there is no way to describe how you feel watching it (especially the live show) other than a feeling of delight. The songs are absolutely classic and memorable - I will never not dance to Time Warp if I hear it - the characters are all imperfect (granted some more than others). It's also absolutely hilarious; it's the one stage show where you encouraged to sing, dance, and even heckle. Regardless of it's frankly mad plot and innuendo-filled script, I highly encourage seeing a live production of Rocky Horror if you can as I can guarantee it will be one of the most fun nights you will ever have. 

Favourite song- Time Warp (duh)

3. The Book of Mormon

- I don't think I can even describe how much I love this show (and it's only at number three so wait for the praise I have for the other two). It is one of the funniest, sweetest, cleverest, most brilliant things I have ever witnessed in my life. The music and book are written by the guys who did South Park so it's humour is perhaps a little dark for some people. But when it comes down to it, it has a nice plot, amazing music, hilarious characters and the staging is fantastic. My twitter name is even named after one of the main characters in this show and has been for five years now (yes I'm a geek). (also follow @elderpr1ce lol). There is a reason it won a Tony for Best Musical and I'm also pretty sure Andrew Rannells was nominated for Best Actor too. Give the Book of Mormon a chance and I'm certain you will crack at smile at least something within it.

Favourite song - Turn it Off or Spooky Mormon Hell Dream

2. Hamilton: An American Musical

- The entire world was talking about Hamilton but I believe it's thoroughly deserved as to why it was so talked about. Lin-Manuel Miranda is an absolute genius and I will fight anyone who says otherwise. Hamilton combines two of my biggest passions - musical theatre and history. It tells the story of the Founding Fathers and the American Revolution in a thoroughly modern way using rap, R&B, musical theatre and Brit-pop music to reflect the characters themselves. Alexander Hamilton was clearly a fascinating man along with his wife Eliza and Miranda's music portrays them in a legacy that is so lovely. I cannot fathom how amazing the music is in this show; there are so many little things within it like foreshadowing and repetition that tie everything together. I managed to get tickets to see Hamilton when it comes to the West End next year and I honestly cannot wait to see it in person as I know if it made me cry just listening to the soundtrack god knows what I'll be like seeing it in the flesh. If you don't like typical musical theatre songs, this may be the musical for you as it is far from a typical musical.
Favourite song - Satisfied

1. Dear Evan Hansen

- So this musical is relatively new but it's already taking Broadway by storm and with it it has taken my heart entirely. The show is about a teenager named Evan Hansen who suffers from social anxiety (same boy same) who gets caught in a web of lies ...that's all I will go into because I highly encourage you to listen to it. But my gosh this show is just so wonderful and I haven't even seen it live. The music is stunning (written by the guys who wrote the music for La La Land just fyi) and it's a perfect balance between theatre and modern pop music. I relate very much to Evan as a character as I'm pretty sure many people can as who hasn't struggled to fit in at some point and who hasn't ever felt lonely? It deals with mental illness in a lovely, powerful way. Ben Platt is an absolute angel of a singer and I could listen to him all day and you can hear in his voice how much he puts into this show (if he doesn't win the Tony I will literally fly to New York and demand answers from the panel). Just please please listen to it as I can't even tell you how much I adore this show. PLEASE COME TO THE WEST END ALSO THANK YOU. Favourite song - Waving through a Window


I have to give an honourable mention to the musicals Mary Poppins, Hairspray, The Addams Family Musical, Billy Elliot and Heathers as they also all have special places in my heart and their music is outstanding.

Basically just listen to musicals please.
See you soon!
Laura x

a ramble about fandoms

The lovely Daniel J Layton did this video as part of VEDA and it got me thinking a little bit. Complete side-note if you watch YouTubers of any kind please subscribe to Dan as he is an absolute gem and he deserves all the love.

I am a person who has very much been a 'fangirl' especially between the ages of 14-16 ...in fairness I'm still a fangirl now really but I keep it mostly internal now rather than tweeting embarrassing things to said people I fangirl over. Yet I never felt a part of any fandom. My twitter account was never dedicated to specifically one thing nor was my tumblr.
I was known amongst my friends as a definite fangirl of many things - Glee, Harry Potter, Starkid, Youtubers, Doctor Who....the list is rather endless. I'm basically just very passionate about things I enjoy...in fact one of my friends recently told me that was one of her favourite things about me; that I do enjoy things so unashamedly.

Yet when I think about it, was I or have I ever really been part of a 'fandom'? I was definitely active within certain fandoms on tumblr/twitter and I made internet friends because of it, some of whom I've had the pleasure to meet which is just wonderful. I always felt like an outsider however because I never actively looked into fan theories, analysed every moment or even felt as a strongly towards it as others do. There is almost a high-schoolesque clique within fandoms which is ironic as you'd think this would be a place a nerd felt comfortable. (I use nerd as a term of endearment and I am basically referring to myself here). But because I didn't necessarily get totally and completely involved with something I'm passionate about does that make my feelings towards it any less redundant?

I would say no. Despite the fact I am definitely a fan of certain things, I never really got into the whole idea of online fandom as to be honest, it's a scary place to be sometimes (cough phandom cough). Yet I know what I enjoy and I will be vocal about it when I want to be. My friends know I'm one of the biggest Harry Potter nerds around....and all you need to do is look at my tumblr to know I adore certain shows, actors/actresses and youtubers. Just because the people in a fandom may not know me nor I them, what I do know is what makes me happy. So I guess what I'm trying to say is it doesn't matter...if you identify as a fan of something or someone, that's great and I'm glad you've found something that makes you happy. If you're actively involved and your twitter is entirely dedicated to a fandom that's also great. I know I will likely always have a place somewhere in a fandom as a passive role (mainly because I'm old now ...I don't need to fit in on the internet to feed validation....sorta....that's a whole other ball park lol) ...I'm in the clique just because I feel things towards that show or person.

Does this make any sense?

I said the word fandom too much here and for that I apologise. Anyway that was a ramble on being a fan of stuff ....I may write more about this because boy did I learn things about the internet from being a 14 year 'gleek' (even the word gives me horrible flashbacks now) (that show will always have a place in my heart I mean but wow we needed a better collective term).
thanks for reading! Laura x

Book Review - Ready Player One by Ernest Cline

I decided to read Ready Player One by Ernest Cline after I heard a few YouTubers mention it and my housemate also recommended it. I started the book last Wednesday and I finished it Sunday because oh my god I could not put it down. This is the first book in a while that has really captured my attention and I just need more people to read it please (especially before the film adaptation comes out next year)

Ready Player One is set in the not-too-distant-future the 2040's where environmental problems has left much of the planet in desolate states and poverty... except the entire world can also access the OASIS, an interface sort of Virtual Reality type service and game where you can essentially live without ever having to physically go outside. The OASIS was created by James Halliday, a child of the 1980's, so the book is littered with pop culture references (which I absolutely loved); when he dies, his avatar makes an announcement that, just like any good video game, there are Easter Eggs hidden within them. 3 keys will lead to 3 gates and whoever clears all of them with the highest score will become the heir to his fortune and to the OASIS. The book is told from the POV of Wade Watts, or Parzival as his avatar is known, who becomes the first person to make any progress with the Easter Egg hunt. I won't go too much further as I'll start spoiling things but let's just say there's also some people on the Hunt who wouldn't use the OASIS for good...and they won't stop at killing people. 

The writing itself was perhaps a little shoddy at time, things seemed to move on very fast and towards the end, it seemed a little rushed to wrap up some plot holes. However, the story itself had me hooked, you found yourself really wanting to find out what the end of the quest was as well as finding out more about the other people behind their avatars, for example Ar3temis and Aech... we only ever see their avatars until towards the end. Every character is well-rounded. Despite a straight white male protagonist, there is good diversity within the book ranging from sexuality and race not to mention the fact that Ar3temis is clearly the smartest of the main characters and she's female so yay! 

I give this book a strong 9/10 and highly recommend it. If you like sci-fi but also obscure pop culture references, this is a definite read. I'd also say it doesn't have a particular gender preference and the ages of 14 up could read this. 

Thanks for reading! Laura x

#SheInspiresMe

As it's International Women's Day today I thought it would be a good idea to throw together a little post about the women in both my personal life and in the media who inspire me, who remind me everyday that women are absolutely badass, that I can do whatever I put my mind to etc etc. Thanks for everything guys.

The ladies in my fam but namely my lovely mother and sister Rebecca, thank you for being solid constants in my life with support and anything else I could possibly ask for. Mum has taught me to be resilient and take things in my stride. Becks, I can only hope I've been a good big sister so far and I'm so glad you're growing up to be a delightful young lady.

The lovely ladies I'm proud to call my friends; Jem, Jess, Mel, Holly, Amalah, Grace, Laura, Emily, Vicky. You are all absolute angels and thank you for being my friend. You all bring something wonderful to the world and to my life. I cannot wait to see what else you're all gonna do but I know it's gonna be fab.

The ladies in the media across TV, film, music, books and YouTube who inspire me in some way or another is probably a list too big but here are my absolute faves and I'm sure if you've heard of them, know me or have seen their work you'll know why  - Emma Thompson, JK Rowling, Emma Watson, Hazel Hayes, Carrie Hope Fletcher, Emilia Clarke, Aisling Bea, Viola Davis, Uzo Aduba, Helena Bonham Carter....there's countless more I assure you.

The reason for an International Women's Day is to highlight the important issues facing women around the world today, to uplift and inspire the women in your life and to hopefully shut up all the men who ask 'why isn't there an International Man's Day?!?!' - there is. November 19th. Celebrate ladyhood today and be proud of it.

A Response to Dodie Clark - Youtube and the Media

Recently there's been a lot of (for lack of a better word) 'drama' about Youtubers and how the mainstream media portray them. Apparently Zoella is to blame for teenagers not reading....despite the fact the woman has three best-selling books and runs a book club through WHSmiths. But obviously because she talks about make-up, she's a monster.

The lovely Dodie Clark (Doddleoddle online) did this video about how the media talk about and portray Youtubers and she asked for responses. So here is mine. Because oh my god it bothers me how some of them get talked about. 

I've been watching YouTubers since I was about 14/15 (I'm 20 now) and they are some of the people I look up to the most. Is it not better that I look up to people who I've watched grow as both internet personalities and people over the years, who've worked bloody hard for what they've got and what they do, continue to make even better and bigger projects? I've watched some YouTubers before they made it 'big' I guess and it's so wonderful to see people achieving great and inspiring things, particularly when they also genuinely seem like good, kind-hearted people.  For example, Dan and Phil did a worldwide stage tour, Carrie Hope Fletcher played the role of Eponine on the West End and in Dubai (and no she didn't get the role because she's famous on the internet, she got it because she's fantastic), Dodie release an EP, Bry go on tour with Twenty One Pilots, Jack and Dean have their own show....I could name many more wonderful things Youtubers have done. It's inspiring to see people I do hold some form of affection for go on to do brilliant, wonderful things.
On a personal level, I struggled with being homesick, being anxious and some other health problems my first year of uni, if I hadn't have watched certain YouTubers (namely D&P thanks boys lol) I would have been a lot more sad and it helped me get through rough patches as it was 10-15 minutes of my day where I was distracted from my own head. If a YouTuber has made one person feel better about a crappy day what harm can they really be posing to the world? Ask yourself that mainstream media. 

In response to the Guardian article that's caused this discussion, how on earth they can think Zoella is 'ruining literacy', I've got zero clue. My little sister has read Zoe's books and she's not a massive reader - if Zoe's online presence has meant young people have picked up a book instead of their phone or laptop, again what harm is being done? None. 

Some mainstream media seems so obsessed with how much money YouTubers earn. Why on earth does it matter? These people work hard for a living, they are literally all running their own businesses - their channel-  and alongside that, some are working on music, writing books etc. Anytime I've read a newspaper article about YouTubers, it almost always mentions how much they're worth. Louise Pentland, when on Celebrity Mastermind, was asked how much she earns, to which her response was "well how much do you earn?" - no other person in the spotlight would get asked that... but for some reason, being famous online makes it more okay for the media to be invasive. I won't go into the whole PewDiePie drama from the not so distant past as that's a different issue but he did mention the fact that journalists have turned up at his door and I seem to remember a newspaper once printed Zoe and Alfie's address...not only is it awful but it borders on a crime surely.
It really does seem that because some in the mainstream media don't quite understand how these 'kids' online make their money (and be very successful at the same time), they decide to just shame them instead. There does also seem to be a lot of dismissal/misinformation that the main YouTube audience are just 'young teenage girls'. While those who are younger are perhaps more vocal in the YouTube community, I also think that a lot of the audience has grown up with the YouTubers they watch - like I said before I've been watching since I was 14. Therefore this would make the demographic of audiences somewhat older than the media makes out. Some articles I've read dismisses the 'fame' of YouTubers because their audience are young and female - bit sexist innit?

The wonderful Carrie Hope Fletcher made some excellent responses in this video in that YouTube needs the mainstream media so it isn't enough to boycott it but also that the media uses clickbaity titles (as some YouTubers do) in order to get attention/views/clicks on their article. Everyone is doing the same thing so it isn't necessarily a case of new vs old media. It does perhaps need some time for things to merge together but I feel that if some mainstream media got over 'I don't understand this' and researched YouTubers and worked with them rather than against them, the entirety of digital media would become a lot more friendly. Outlets like the Huffington Post and Buzzfeed seem to be doing this crossover quite well in my opinion.

Well this is a somewhat rambling post I do apologise. I hope it makes sense - thinking about it I might write some more pieces on YouTube as it is a part of my life that I'm passionate about. Thanks for reading and see you soon :)
Laura x

The Girl from the Savoy - book review!

Because I am a university student who does a Humanities degree it means I spend the majority of my time reading which ultimately means my reading for pleasure suffers as I tend to use my breaks to catch up on TV or YouTube. However, after starting this book last August (and then stupidly leaving it at my friend's house who lives an hour away from me....plus I got distracted by the Cursed Child script whoops) I finally finished The Girl from the Savoy last week so thought I'd do a little review!

I read one of  Hazel Gaynor's other books, A Memory of Violets, last year and I absolutely adored it so I was very excited to read The Girl from the Savoy. I'm a history student/geek who is a romantic at heart so Hazel's fiction is very much up my street. I will highly recommend A Memory of Violets (and I may even say at a push I enjoyed it slightly more than this one ahem)

The Girl from the Savoy is set in 1920's London, funnily enough at the Savoy Hotel. Hotels are a setting I often find fascinating because you come across literally anyone and everyone, no matter the point in history. It follows the story of Dolly Lane, a young aspiring actress who becomes a maid at the Savoy, as well as Loretta May, a famous West End star. They both hold secrets in their past, they have both loved and lost and their stories intertwine together to form a wholesome, interesting story.

What I particularly found interesting about this book was the slight twist (probably the best way to word it) in terms of the romantic story lines. No spoilers but it did seem as if the story was heading one way only to demonstrate that love is a fickle, delicate thing and just because a person seems right for you, and perhaps in another world or time they would be the right person, it doesn't mean it all works out happily. The book also covers various topics such as sexual abuse, illness, losing a loved one and the issues of the soldiers who returned from war. It contains two central female characters who come from different walks of life but wholeheartedly support one another which warms my little feminist heart right to the centre. In terms of the setting, the whole world of 1920's London is a magical place it seems (obviously this was not necessarily the case but Hazel does a lovely job of describing and making you get entirely engrossed in this glamorous past)

My slight issue with the book was that it dragged a little in the middle and a plot device at the end did seemingly come a little from nowhere. But that may have been because I also read this book normally quite late at night so I may have just not picked up on the hints about it. However, the characters are interesting and even though occasionally flawed (but who isn't?), they are people you find yourself rooting for and it keeps the reader invested.

On the whole, I rate this book a solid 8/10 and would definitely recommend.

Bye for now!!
Laura x

La La Land - mini-review

So the film the whole world seems to be talking about at the moment is La La Land and I finally managed to see it this past weekend as a post-exam treat! (thanks for paying for my ticket mum and dad lol) No spoilers!!

Mini-review- first things first, this has to be one of the prettiest films I have ever seen in terms of direction and cinematography. Every scene was clearly so well thought out in terms of colour scheme, position of props etc etc. Visually, it was just stunning to look at - that goes for the costumes as well. The music was just lovely, recurring themes woven throughout them and City of Stars has quickly become a new favourite of mine.

Emma Stone was superb as per usual, she captured the character of Mia delightfully (I am slightly biased though as I love anything she does). Ryan Gosling was also very good as Sebastian, however I personally felt his character was slightly dull but that was not necessarily his fault.

I think my main issue with this film was the fact when you strip away the music, the pretty songs and scenery, the story is essentially kind of boring and definitely a story Hollywood has done before. Girl meets boy, blah blah blah. However, the callbacks to the old Hollywood musicals like Singing in the Rain, Casablanca etc were a lovely touch and making it a modern love story was interesting.

On the whole, I'd recommend it and I would say it is worthy of it's nominations in the award shows especially in the case of direction and cinematography as I am still thinking about how beautifully some of the scenes were shot.

Soz for the short length of this; I'm planning bigger and better posts to come.
Thanks for reading, Laura x

general ramblings about mental health at university

Having been a semi-successful university student for a year and a half now, I have some thoughts. Not only about what university has meant for me/done for me, but about growing up in general I guess. I'm halfway through my second year now and I should be revising instead of writing this but I said  I was gonna write something every week and damn it I am going to.

Number one - you're on your own kid.
I mean I know it's kinda obvious when you go to university, you're suddenly away from your home, your family, your friends and familiar surroundings. But it didn't really hit me until I shut the door to my tiny little room last year after saying bye to my parents. I turned round, looked at the bare walls and my belongings (that didn't look right out of my bedroom at home)...and burst into tears. Anyone who knows me knows I am such a home-bird and being away suddenly felt like I'd made a huge mistake. I wasn't ready to live independently!

As it turns out, I was ready to live independently and it's all just nerves taking over. I had lovely flatmates (well bar one but we won't talk about him) and everyone is in the same boat. Talk to people, ask for help and breathe deeply if it's getting too much.

Number two - mental health and self-care
I've always been an anxious person  - I worry too much, I stress about very trivial things and I'm very paranoid when it comes to friendships, I don't really know why. But it was during the first term at university, things started to get quite bad. I became afraid to leave my little room in my flat essentially due to the fear something would go wrong in public. I had been diagnosed with stress-related IBS ...so when I had a bad flare-up in a lecture (essentially it was a horrendous stomach cramp that left me feeling like I was gonna throw up everywhere) my brain started to associate my stomach issues to lectures. Therefore lectures became a scary place to be. Which then latched itself onto any public place ... the shops, seminars, where I volunteered. It was scary and unfamiliar to me. I shut myself away a lot of the time which didn't help. Eventually I went to the doctor who referred me to a counsellor. I was told I had agoraphobia - the fear of public spaces - as well as some general anxiety that reinforced it. It sounds dumb I know but it was nice to put a name to the thing that had been bothering me for a long time. After two months of working on this, I began to feel better. I could tell the voice in my head to shut up, that I was fine, nothing bad was going to happen. I began to enjoy my studies again.

Mental health is so bloody important, never ever neglect it. If you need to spend a day eating junk food and watching crappy tv, you do it. Forget your deadlines (not completely tho) and take care of yourself. Have a bath, read a book, even just going for a walk may help clear your hand and calm you down. I'd never really had to look after myself in such a way before but now I know it's super-important that you take breaks. If I'm getting overwhelmed, it's time to go to talk to my housemate or watch a YouTube video or listen to a song. LOOK AFTER YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU'RE A DELIGHT OKAY <3

Number three-  nightlife
Due to the whole 'I-don't-like-public-spaces' thing, I really hate nightclubs. Give me a cider and a pub quiz any day of the week instead of having to pay stupid entry fees to be squished up against drunk strangers. I don't really drink as it is, I know my limits and I very rarely go beyond them. University if you don't drink (or don't drink that much) is kinda weird as it's a thing everyone does.  I don't like going out, it's just not my thing. But that's okay, you'll find like-minded people. Even if you don't and a lot of your friends do like going out (which mine do) you'll find they won't really judge you for it. I may have been lucky in this sense however so don't take my word for it. It's all a case of you do you I think. I won't judge you for going out as long as you don't judge me for not. This works probs 99% of the time. Yes this does tie into mental health.... because you gotta do stuff you enjoy, you can't just force yourself into situations cause you think it's what others do. That's only gonna lead to you feeling worse. I can promise that.

There is probably more I could go into but I think I'll save some stuff for another blogpost...
see ya next week.
Laura x

2017 - I may finally stick to this???

I'm pretty sure since I was 15, I've been saying 'I'm gonna write a blog' and my own laziness/the feeling nobody really cared if I was writing anything or not took over and I just didn't stick to it.
However, I'm 20 now. I can write better than I used to (I think anyway), I still have a lot to say on various matters ... some important, some not so much.
My New Year's Resolution is to try and write a blog post every week about something and to try and not give one if no-one else is reading because I shouldn't do it for other people, it should be for me.
It may not happen....but we're gonna give it a go because for once, I want to stick to something that I said I was going to!
Let's do this thing. New post to be up some point this week until I get my life sorted enough to figure out a decent day to write and stuff.
For now though folks, peace out
Laura x